me as a parent.

amarriageoftrueminds:

#they literally had to take this out because it was so gay

2srooky:

abunchofgrapes:

2srooky:

whyamisospooky:

you’re such a b**** (bagel)

image

why is ewan mcgregor saying that in front of a waterfall

Why not.

liquidglue:

liquidglue:

liquidglue:

liquidglue:

'cause the players gonna play play play play play

alligators alligate gate gate gate gate

elevators elevate vate vate vate vate

shake it off

crappybird:

you know you’re fucked when those late night thoughts start hitting you in the middle of the day

basedgosh:

i feel like tall people at concerts have everything they want in the world

nialllhoran:

men’s back muscles let you know that god is real

last-snowfall:

weareallmedie:

firedanceryote:

reptila-tequila:

qeilla:

thefreckledavantgardegoober:

mysticmisfit89:

Meanwhile, in prehistoric Canada…..

No no, you don’t understand, moose really do get that big. Take it from a Canadian. I’ve seen that bullshit in person. Scary as all heck.

And that’s how people can die if they hit a moose. Seriously, one of our fears when driving in the country is having to deal with this scenario of a moose jumping out in front of the car.

moose are actual legit ice age megafauna; theyve been here since the ice age, they are old as fuck. they also are pretty terrifying and ive echoed this before but i went to wiki and “In terms of raw numbers, they attack more people than bears and wolves combined” and “ In the Americas, moose injure more people than any other wild mammal and, worldwide, only hippopotamuses injure more.”

like, fuck off with that

I was dog sitting a dog once who insisted she had to go out in the middle of the night it was an emergency, so I took her out. Suddenly she starts pointing and barking and I look up and can just make out the outline of a HUGE moose. I’ve been accidentally face to face with a black bear and that scared me less than being up close with a moose. I’m 5 foot so imagine staring up at an animal several feet taller than you that is debating charging the dog who’s leash you are holding. I was terrified as I grabbed the dog by her collar to get better control over her and backed up slowly til I was out of line of sight and bolted for the house at a dead run. Did you know most Canadian lake monster stories come from people seeing moose swimming? They are massive animals.

They are massive and they charge. I get so scared when tourists are all “oh yeah, we got out of the car to get a closer look and, ya’ll have some mighty impressive animals around here.”

Yes, yes we do, and they have mighty tired guardian angels because moose can, and do, charge at people.

I’ve always said that moose hunting season is the one time of the year we’re allowed to fight back.

Someone my mom worked with died hitting a moose on the highway. Their eyes don’t reflect light. In the dark they are literally nothing but a big slightly darker shape in the night.

Roughly every year in the town I grew up in, a cow (moose) and her calf will wander through downtown. Maybe once or twice. If she’s aggressive enough, the local Mounties will escort her through to keep idiots away.

kvncause:

Homegirl on a mission

kvncause:

Homegirl on a mission

spreadyourwiings:

socially-inactive:

pyroluminescence:

I’M

I LOVE YOU KAREN

Dying

  • shrek one: BEST
  • shrek two: the funniest movie i have ever seen. literally one of the funniest comedies of all time. incredible pacing and dialogue. reference jokes that were actually funny. surreal world that was so modern fantasy it actually worked. rocking score. awesome scene set to "i need a hero" being sung by the villain unironically and completely played straight. a bar of villains. just overall the best concepts ever.
  • shrek three: bad
  • shrek four: bad

taranamgabata:

did u know, there’s this small rural town in japan called obama.
so there’s this girl in a 2007 drama who moved from the city to obama.
and she hates it at first and blames the town for her misery.
i kid u not. didn’t make this shit up.

amoying:

Chris Pratt seems like a guy that would get drunk with you and then carry you home